I am a survivor of a survivor. A father. I understand how this disease affects the body. The partners. The children. The outlook on life. The ups and downs with the disease. I also understand how this applies to life without the tragedy of cancer.
I help people deal with the smaller tragedies of everyday life- frustrations of family, friends, and relationships. This is not therapy.
I help you see the thoughts that drive your feelings and ultimately your results.
I help you control those thoughts and control your feelings to get the results you want.
My story starts like most and takes a turn far too many. While in graduate school I met my wife to be Alina- at a nightclub of all places- this is how we use to swipe right and left pre-dating apps. Love at first sight. Dated for a few years I “pop” the question and get a yes!
A year later my first was born and a few years later my second. Including her firstborn- we were a blended family- we were a happy home of 5.
Then came Alina’s cancer diagnosis. Shocked. Terrified. Confused.
Yes and questions of how and why and what runs like water through your mind.
After over a year of aggressive treatment and she was ‘cancer-free’ for almost 2 years then the 2nd diagnosis but this time it had spread.
In all, almost 9 years of fighting, and living life to the fullest between chemo treatments.
In some ways, they were some of the best years because of how we’d grown and come to appreciate what we had and our time together. I had by this time lost my uncles, my dad, my mom, and now Alina, and the boys without their mom, their guiding light.
It reads like a tragedy because it is. But, it’s also a story of love, laughter, proud moments, great memories, and cherished friendships.
Some think when cancer arrives life ends. That can be the case but I have come to believe that life is what you make it.
The saving grace is how we approach and think about our circumstances.
It doesn’t change a diagnosis or survival rates but it can change you- the only thing you can control sometimes.
Even if you have an amazing team of doctors and specialists they may not be able to provide support for the everyday struggles. The thoughts that paralyze you with fear, making you unproductive at work, feel disconnected from your family.
These things happen as a way of shielding you from the intensity of emotions that come with the treatments, recovery, and prognosis.
I want to help you manage those feelings. Help you stay connected with all the people that need you. I want to hear your story, I want to help.
For those of you not living through a cancer diagnosis but your struggles are real too. I want to hear your story and I want to help.